Find Your Riding Buddy
Many activities are best enjoyed with the company of another person, and motorcycling is no exception. Solo riding has its benefits, but many of our readers wonder how they go about finding that special friend—a riding buddy—to journey alongside with and to enjoy the many amazing experiences a motorcycle offers.
I’ve had five significant riding partners over my 27 years in the saddle, people with whom I’ve been blessed to share many incredible road-born experiences. I have memories to last a lifetime because of them. My wish for those who desire it, is that you find that one best buddy (or two best buddies) who sees motorcycling through the same lens you do, can translate your facial expressions and silent glances without a word being uttered, and when you ride side by side (in staggered formation, of course), your tires literally sync up with one another.
To assist our readers in finding a riding partner, WRN assistant editor Tricia Szulewski and I jotted down a list of ways that have proven successful for each of us as well as many others in their quest to find a riding buddy. Before you read the list, heed these golden rules to enhance your chances of success of finding that “perfect” partner.
Golden Rules
- Be outgoing. It helps to have the skill of starting a conversation with a stranger.
- Keep an open mind. Opposites attract … but can also complement each other. My most memorable motorcycling memories were with a woman who was the complete opposite of me, but that made for some of the most hilarious laugh-crying moments of my life.
- Adopt the mindset that you are here to "serve" instead of being "served." Make the "riding buddy quest" more about finding someone you can serve through friendship and love instead of being about filling a selfish need. You put out what you attract, so you're likely to find someone with that same "giving" mindset, which sets a good foundation for a great relationship.
- Don’t be offended easily. Actually, don’t be offended ever. Offense is an awful trait and can lead you down a path to bad emotions that include hurt and unforgiveness. Once those bad seeds take root in your heart, they’re very hard to dig up and let go. So it’s best to never let offense get a hold of you. Stop it at the pass by turning your heart immediately towards compassion, kindness, and love.
- It’s not that hard. Meeting others to ride with really isn’t so hard because motorcyclists, generally speaking, are very nice people. Remember, you’re participating in an activity where almost everyone wants the same thing—to enjoy the open road and to share it with others.
Ways to Meet Other Riders
1. Attend a Dealer Event
Make a point of showing up at local dealer events like an open house or barbecue and mingle with riders there. This is where it helps to be outgoing.
2. Hang Out at a Dealership
If you don’t like social events, find an excuse to hang out at your local dealership where riders of the same brand come to shop and hang out too. Many stores have created a destination atmosphere and have lounges with coffee and snacks.
In my early days, I would ride once or twice a week to my local dealership just to practice my new skills while using the excuse to pick up the freebie motorcycle magazines. I’d chat up the parts counter and sales guys who helped educate me about the motorcycling world. I also made sure they knew I was a new single rider looking for a riding partner in case they knew anyone to recommend. One day, I introduced myself to a woman who rode to the dealership to drop off her motorcycle for service. She introduced me to another woman, who would become the riding buddy I would have the most fun with during my early days of riding.
3. Find a Bike Night
In my early days, I would ride once or twice a week to my local dealership just to practice my new skills while using the excuse to pick up the freebie motorcycle magazines. I’d chat up the parts counter and sales guys who helped educate me about the motorcycling world. I also made sure they knew I was a new single rider looking for a riding partner in case they knew anyone to recommend. One day, I introduced myself to a woman who rode to the dealership to drop off her motorcycle for service. She introduced me to another woman, who would become the riding buddy I would have the most fun with during my early days of riding.
This is the perfect place in the article to touch on a subject that inevitably comes up when discussing riding partners: the opposite sex. Prior to meeting my first female riding friend, I was mentored by a male riding partner. He was a friend, but wanted more. I enjoyed learning from him, and hanging with him, but I grew weary of fending off his subtle advances despite my efforts stating clearly that I just wanted to be friends.
Without making too much of a stink here, this is something I’ve found that heterosexual women riders have to deal with when hooking up with a rider of the opposite sex. Ladies: while I don’t frown upon having a riding buddy of the opposite sex, riding a motorcycle can be sexy (OK, it is sexy) … and well … situations have the potential to get messy despite your best efforts at open and honest communication. So, keep things simple by a) finding a riding partner of the same sex or b) if you can’t, then state your intentions up front so no one can ever say you didn’t tell him so.
4. Take a Skills Class
Whether you’re a beginner or advanced rider, take a motorcycle skills class. You’re sure to meet others who are looking to expand their network of riding friends there too, one of whom might become a good riding friend.
5. Join a Motorcycle Riding Club
There are hundreds of women-only riding groups across the U.S., and globally (listed on this page on WRN). While group riding may or may not be for you, joining a club is a great way to meet a lot of riders all at once, one or two who might just be your “go-to” riding friend when you’re itching to put on some miles.
In my opinion, a woman who attends a motorcycle event by herself is brave. Where everyone else there seems to be having all the fun with lots of friends, she’s arrived alone. In my 27 years attending many motorcycle rallies and events, I find that more than half the people attending are looking to meet new friends and have fun. The person who looks like she’s surrounded by a lot of friends may have just hooked up with some riders from her neighborhood going to same rally. She’d actually prefer to meet someone new.
Many times in my early days of riding I attended the Sturgis Motorcycle Rally by myself to cover the event for the media outlet I was working for at the time. I’d finish with an interview and photos by noon and now I had the rest of the day to play but no one to play with. I could feel my mind start to go into the “feeling sorry for myself” place because I didn’t have anyone to ride with. I quickly halted that thought process and instead regained my confidence enough to engage others in parking lots and gas stations. Before I’d even have a chance to ask these fun ladies (or guys) if I could ride with them for the afternoon, the invitation was already there for me. Now it’s my choice if I want to join in. You may not meet your future riding buddy this way, but you’ll have fun hanging with some new riders while enjoying all the event has to offer.
7. Network Through Social Media
Before there were sites like Facebook and Instagram, there were online forums bringing likeminded riders together for virtual chats about similar motorcycles and interests. One WRN reader shared her story of meeting her riding buddies through such a forum. Simply do a search online for a forum focused on your particular motorcycle brand or type of riding, for example V-twin, Honda Shadow, adventure touring, etc. See what comes up.
In addition to forums, these days we have social media sites like Facebook and Instagram, and networking sites like MeetUp to help people hook up with others in similar areas of interest. There are hundreds of women rider Facebook groups, as well as groups focused on a particular motorcycling interest or category. While not all groups are location-based, Facebook group pages provide the opportunity to meet riders online with a similar interest, which could lead to a friendship.
8. Ask Other Riders
When out on your motorcycle, approach other riders you see stopped for gas or at a restaurant. Ask them if they can recommend any riding groups. That's a good icebreaker. I bet you'll get an invitation to ride with them.
When riding with others, be sure to read our two stories on riding in a group: this one on the skills portion, and this one on etiquette.
9. Become a Mentor
Don’t let your motorcycling skills and knowledge benefit just yourself. Offer to be a mentor to someone you meet who might just be starting out. Or convince a non-riding friend to take up riding. Before long, this person will be “up to speed” and may turn out to be a fun, equally skilled riding buddy.
Keep the conversation going. Tell us in the comments below your ideas on ways to meet a fellow riding partner.
Related Articles
Group Riding Etiquette: 10 Rules to Live By
Riding Right: Riding in a Group
Your Stories: How the Internet Brought 4 Riders Together
How Do I Find A Motorcycle Riding Mentor?
Fastest Growing Women's Group Right Now
National and Regional Women's Riding Clubs
I would like to find someone (female) to ride with! I have a Harley and I also enjoy off road riding. There are a ridiculous amount of places to ride here. I’m basically shy, and I found one group, but it’s in another part of the state. I’ve taken a class (to get my endorsement), but that was some time ago. I suppose since winter is around the corner, maybe I’ll put something out there this spring and see if I can find any females who want to ride with me. I don’t mind riding alone, but it sure would be fun to find a girl to travel with!
Hi Sandy,One great way to find a riding buddy is to join a riding group, or attend one of its functions. Check out our listing of women’s motorcycle riding groups here.Best of luck!
Thanks for the articles. I have only been riding for a couple of years. I have a riding buddy but he is out of town for extended stretches and I have no one to ride with. I have ridden on the street alone but never off road alone, which is what I love to ride. Because I’m fairly inexperienced I’m hesitant to show up alone to one of the local rides, off road or street.
Thank you for the well written article. I have been riding for about 50 years (probably one of the first female riders on the eastern shore). I started with a mini-bike at 8 years old and just kept going. I am so excited to see so many female riders these days from all walks of life. I usually ride solo because even though I am a member of a small female riding club here in Tidewater, Virginia, it just seems when events are planned I am working. I do, however, offer to mentor whenever possible and always offer advice and answer any questions that new riders have. Anything I can do to encourage female riders to get out there and experience the bliss of two-wheeled touring I will do. Good suggestion on stopping at dealerships. I do that myself on occasion.Thank you again for the article. And ladies, never stop trying. Age is but a number and motorcycle riding keeps you young!
Don’t rely on others, start your own group in your community. My hubby (and best riding partner) and I started a riders group at our church and this is how we met our two best couple riding buddies. (It’s not just singles that need buddies, but couples too.) Use social media to connect and plan, and easily add more riders to the group. If you explore your other social (or work) groups, you might find a few other riders that you already have a connection with, then create. Be your own advocate and have fun!
I have found the best riding partner to be my husband. I never have to ride alone! We have joined bike clubs and that works well. As a women it is harder to find other women who ride their own bikes. I also have noticed an attitude with a lot of newer women riders that leans heavy on the “I’m so cool because I am a woman that rides” edge and that is a turnoff to me. I look for safe, smart riders and couldn’t care less how cool you look or feel. Ride safe and keep the rubber on the road.
This is a great article! I am 60 years old, and a very new rider. I am desperately trying to find someone willing to ride with me, and give me the confidence I need. I would like to find another new rider, like myself, but that is proving difficult for me. I am not giving up! Thank you for keeping us informed. Your articles are fantastic!
Great article! I am very shy and do not easily interact with strangers. Wish I could step outside my comfort zone to meet fellow riders. Tried to join an all-female riding club and it was nothing but drama.
I love the article and suggestions on how and where to meet people to ride with. I traded in my Harley for a Harley trike a while ago so I could take my 9 year old son with me and be more visible. He’s more comfortable on long trips on the trike.But once I went from two wheels to three I found that not many bikers wanted to ride with me anymore. Yes, I belong to a Harley club at three dealerships for about six years now and know a lot of the members, but once I made the choice to ride a trike it changed.But my chapter is full of long-time members who have their own clicks which I don’t do. But it’s hard to find others to ride with with. I did have a few I ride with from time to time on Can-Ams but it’s hard to get together all the time and they are so much fun and we ride well together.I guess what I’m trying to say is I’ve talked to a lot of people about their chapters and they are so different than the one I belong to. It’s so sad that the old timers don’t want change. They don’t want to go to new riding places and they don’t like the younger bikers coming in and trying to make change. Change can be good! People in Florida are very different. Thank you for your article I know it will help and I’m going to find other groups to ride with.
Great article! I’ve traveled twice now almost cross-country with a friend I met only two years ago on a Facebook page for ladies. I was looking to do my first cross-country tour in 2005, and she was headed the same way, so we met in Michigan (she was from North Carolina; me from Maine) and off we went. We just completed another trip from Pennsylvania to Colorado. We travel well together and it’s great to have someone along.
Here’s a picture of a trip from New Hampshire to Old Forge, New York, in the Adirondacks with my HOG Chapter. I joined alone and have made lifelong friends and met my husband. Good times and great riding with great people!
You have very good sound advice. I enjoy reading your tips, thanks.I just started riding a year ago. I have a trike so it’s hard to find a lady rider with a trike where I live.
Where did you get that luggage holder on that red Switchback?
Hi, it’s a Harley-Davidson aftermarket accessory that goes with that motorcycle. You can ask for it at the parts counter of any Harley-Davidson dealership.
Thanks for sharing this article. It certainly caught my attention. I have ridden a few times with a mixed group but realize that I would rather have one or two riding buddies to develop a friendship and a mutual love for riding. You presented some good tips which I plan to try a couple. We’ll see what happens.
Taking a riding class is a great way to meet people but teaching the class brings dozens to you!I’ve been a RiderCoach for 14 years and many of my early riding buddies were people I met in the class. While I prefer to ride with women to prevent the “mess” addressed in the article, I did happen to meet my sweetie (now of 2-plus years) when he came to my class. It took 13 years of coaching to get a date!
Awesome response Lizz. And so great to hear of your success story in finding a riding buddy / “sweetie.” You’re as cute as ever by the way. Thanks for sharing the photo.