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In June of 2000, at age 35, I left my last abuser for the tenth and last time. I was done having surgeries on my face. I was done being told, “Youre too ugly to be seen in public with me.” And I knew if I stayed there I was going to die at the hands of this man who constantly and repeatedly told me he loved me.
On June 26, 2000 I climbed on a Greyhound bus in Portland, Oregon, and I ran for my life to Phoenix, Arizona. When I got off the bus I had $80 in my pocket. I had a backpack and a duffel bag. I did not know a soul in Arizona. I had no job and no job prospects. I had no place to stay. I spent my first night in Arizona at the bus station in Phoenix, and my life has been absolutely awesome ever since!
Three years after I got off that bus, I wrote a workbook and created a workshop consisting of the tools I used to create a whole new life for myself. The workshop is called SWAN, which is an acronym for Somebody Worth Accepting Now. I began presenting SWAN at domestic violence shelters in June of 2003 with such awesome results that I knew I had found my lifes purpose. It is the most fulfilling thing in the world to be able to use a really ugly history in a positive way to help others to not have the same kind of history.
In 2004 I created SwanRider, a nonprofit corporation dedicated to getting the word out to as many victims of domestic violence as possible that patterns can be broken and that there is another choice that can be made. One of the choices I made for myself was to realize a lifelong dream of owning a Harley, and now, as I ride to shelters around the state of Arizona to present my workshop to these women, I know I am making a difference in the world. I use my own experiences as examples, and I use myself and my life as proof that dreams can, and do come true!
Also in 2004 I became a certified speaker for the Arizona Coalition Against Domestic Violence. It is such a powerful thing for me, a former victim, to ride up on my Harley and tell my story to whatever group I happen to be speaking to, from politicians to health care professionals to attorneys to prison inmates.
A couple of weeks ago I was invited to a volunteer appreciation dinner at the prison complex in Florence, Arizona, where I was presented with a black and orange “HARLEY” license plate that the inmates had made for me. I love that plate and will treasure it always as a reminder that I have completely turned my life around, and in the process Ive made a positive difference in who knows how many other lives. Dreams do come true I know this for a fact, and I enjoy mine every day!
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